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第57章 The Number One“SignagePolice”(4)

When he was at Lanzhou University, he visited the city museum andfound there were no English captions at all. He volunteered to writefor these museums but, to his regret, his offer was not appreciated andthe museum officials told him that they “didn’t need it”。 “Maybe theyfelt there were too few foreign visitors there,” he guessed. After hisoffer was turned down, he tried every means to make Chinese peopleunderstand that “Foreigners are especially interested in museums. Usuallythey get their first knowledge of a country from its museums. Butin China at that time, people didn’t give due attention to museums”。

He always held a nearly religious devotion to Chinese culture.

In museums, when he sees a guide explaining the sights to tourists inEnglish, he often listens to the guide for a while, then comes up to tellhim or her honestly: “Your English is good, but in some cases it cannotbe easily understood by foreigners. I suggest you say… He encountered quite a number of English signs that he couldn’

t make sense of, not even to guess their meaning. He had to ask hisgraduate students to retranslate them first. After revising them, hewould send the improved versions to the committee and ProfessorChen Lin to check their cultural accuracy. Professor Chen is wellknownamong translators and enthusiasts of the English language. Hiscollaboration with Chen ensured the quality of the translations. That’swhy Chinese and foreign friends call the two the “signage police”。

Michael Cook is another friend who works with him on the committee.

Michael, a Briton who grew up in China, speaks Chinese as17 0 fluently as his native tongue. Because of the differences between BritishEnglish and American English, the “signage police” often havedisputes regarding translations. Sometimes they compromise witheach other on their disagreements or, if compromise was impossible,they would ask Mr. Liu Yang, Chairman of the Organizing committee,for arbitration. Thinking that Michael’s Chinese is too good, but LaoDu’s opinion should be respected, Mr. Liu would say jokingly: “If LaoDu understands it; anybody can understand it,” or, “If Lao Du’s happy,I’m happy.” Luckily, Michael could accept Mr. Liu’s “partiality” andof course Lao Du is amiable. So they let it pass. But the committeealso decided in their first meetings to use American English rather thanBritish English in Beijing signage.

Lao Du became famous for his English sign corrections and becamefamiliar to more and more locals. When walking down the street,he would be greeted by many strangers. “Hi, Lao Du. You missed asign at… Go take a look.” Or “Hi, Lao Du, why haven’t you correctedthe English mistakes in Xiushui Street?” Not long ago, a TV correspondentfrom NBC came to tell him that there were three Englishmistakes on street signs that he had missed and offered to go with himto inspect.

The letter “L” was missing from the sign of “the Temple of theSun”; “the Crescent Moon Spring” was translated as the “CurvedPoo”; the English commentary for the Zhihua Temple contained a seriouserror that turned the temple into an unknown fairytale. What wasfarthest off the beam was the English name for the sign of a proctologyhospital in Chaoyang District: “Hospital for Anus and IntestineDisease.” This indecent sign always provoked explosive laughter fromforeign visitors. They would grab their cameras and have their picturestaken standing in front of the sign. I can imagine that we would laughour heads off if we were abroad and saw a Chinese sign reading “AnusHospital”; for sure we would have our picture taken with the sign. ButLao Du did not think it was funny at all, because this was the picturethe lao wai were taking home as a reminder of their visit to China. LaoDu wanted them taking home pictures of them standing at the GreatWall, the Forbidden City, or the Temple of Heaven, showing the great ness of China, not these silly signs. The next day he went to the hospitaland suggested they change the sign. The hospital changed it withintwo weeks at a cost of 30,000 yuan.

He keeps two computers in his study, one in English and the otherin Chinese. For years, Du Dawei has corrected, proofread, and compiledmaterials in English. The 6-volume “Handbook of Translations”,for example, bears his painstaking efforts and those of the entire committeeon each and every page. The handbooks have been published,the mangled English signage will soon be gone from view. Bathroomsor restrooms have been standardized to “toilet”, with men’s as “Gents/Men” and women’s as “Ladies/Women”。 The sign for restricted entryis “Staff Only”。 The sign of “Show Mercy to Grass” now reads “PleaseKeep Off the Grass.” “Danger! High Voltage” has replaced “Be carefulof being electrified”。

In order to standardize “W.C.” to “Toilet”, the committee soughtthe advice of the British Embassy in Beijing. They found out that“W.C.” was actually a British euphemism which doesn’t make anysense to Americans. “Toilet”, which is derived from Latin, is obviousto British, Americans, Italians, or Spanish, etc. A great sense of accomplishmentarose in his mind when he saw that “Toilet” had finallyreplaced “W.C.” throughout the city.

He has developed a yen for finding and correcting English errors.

Whether on business or pleasure trips, he always keeps his eyes openfor loopy English signs. Once he finds such signs, he never gives up.