书城外语寻找人生的坐标
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第31章 过平静生活的代价是什么

What Is the Price of Personal Peace

佚名 / Anonymous

We want to live in peaceful times,in peaceful communities, in peaceful families. When asked what people wanted most in their lives, surveys showed that peace of mind topped the list. As with most things we want, though, it has a price. Are you prepared to pay?

If you are still yelling at the driver in front of you, there cannot be peace. If you believe your way is the only way, there cannot be peace. If you are more likely to judge others than reflect on yourself, there cannot be peace. Peace is a construct of people. It is an agreement that there is a better way to live, and a commitment to that way. That way is. . . peacefully.

How’s your temper? Do you offer others a piece of your mind often?

Oh, you do not even have to open your mouth to pass judgment. Just roll or avert your eyes. That doesn’t leave too much to the imagination.

Remember you cannot not communicate. Peace has a price tag. Each person has to pay it or they simply cannot have it. Here are a few ways to save up for it:

Work on Your Self-development

When you find yourself judging others, first ask yourself if you are blameless in those areas. When you have taken care of the issue responsibly yourself, you will better understand how to be most helpful to others.

Focus on Solutions not Problems

Rather than looking for someone to blame, put your energy into creating a better way to rectify a situation or to prevent a recurrence. Work towards agreement for solutions. That’s a much better use for your energy.

Identify Your Feelings Correctly

Take the time to identify the feeling you are experiencing accurately and give it a name. People can understand fear, frustration and pain when it is described. Talking about it brings clarity to communication. Anger is an arousal in your body in response to fear, frustration or pain. Simply being angry causes folks to move away from you.

Be Accountable, Responsible and Congruent

Keep your commitments to yourself and others. When in doubt, actions speak louder than words. When behavior is not congruent with words, believe the behavior. And walk your talk.

Maintain Your Balance

You are entitled to your opinions, beliefs, values and lifestyle. Your choices have consequences for you and others.

Consider the consequences before acting or speaking. To have peace it is essential to live without infringing on the rights and freedoms of others to have their opinions, beliefs,values and lifestyle. Peaceful living requires tolerance, acceptance, and, good fences and boundaries.

Be Very Clear about What Is Important, Significant and Valuable to You

When you know what you value and live accordingly, you will find peace. Then, it is yours to share. You cannot give a gift you do not have.

When you have conserved your energy in these ways, you will have the price of peace. There is only one catch. If you want to keep it, you simply have to keep paying the price!

我们渴望生活在一个和平的时代,和谐的社区,和睦的家庭。当人们被问起一生中最想要什么时,调查表明,“人们最渴望获得内心的平静。正如很多我们所思所想所求的事物一样,都有其价值。而你准备好支付了吗?

如果你仍抱怨于现在的生活方式,你就不会拥有平静。如果你一意孤行于自己的处世方式,你就不会拥有平静。如果你指责别人胜过自我反省,你就不会拥有平静。平静是用来构建人的一种材料,平静是承认有一种更好的生活方式,并对那种方式持之不渝。那种方式就是……平静地生活。

脾气如何?

你的性情是怎样的呢?你时常给别人提供意见吗?

哦,你甚至不用开口去评断。只要闭上或转移视线就行。留给你想象的空间并不多。

记住,你必须要与人沟通。平静是交流的纽带。为之努力付出否则将一无所获。对于平静,这里有几个方法需要记住:

致力于自我发展

当你发现你在评价别人时,首先问问你自己是否有这个资格。当你很负责地下定结论时,你最好想想是否对他人有帮助。

致力于解决问题,而不是问题本身

不要寻找别人的过错,要将精力集中于去创造一个调整状况或是避免错误再次发生的方法上。通过协商找到解决办法,这是一个更好的使用能力的办法。

正确判断自己的感觉

用点时间来正确判断你当时的感觉,并赋予它一个名字。人们在描述的过程中都会明白其中的恐惧、挫败和痛苦。谈论的过程会有助于交流。恼怒是你内心燃起的对于恐惧、挫败或是痛苦的反应。恼怒会让人们离你远去。

有责任心,可靠,适度

尊重自己和他人许下的诺言。怀疑时,行动要比语言更有力。言行不一致时,要相信行为。并且,按你所说的去做。

凡事保持平衡

你有资格拥有自己的看法、信仰、价值观和生活方式。你的选择是你和他人的判断。

在表达和行事之前要考虑后果。要拥有平静,不要侵犯他人的权益以及他人拥有自己的看法、信仰、价值观和生活方式的自由。平静的生活要求宽容、接受以及良好的自我防护。

分清楚对你来说什么才是重要的,有意义和有价值的

当你在了解自己的价值观并基于其生活时,你就会找到平静。随后,与他人分享。你不会赠与他人你没有的礼物。

当你以这些方式行事时,你就会拥有平静的代价。这是唯一获取的方法,如果你想要保留它,你必须要付出代价!

记忆填空

1. If you are yelling at the driver in front of , there cannot be peace. If you believe your way is the way, there cannot be peace. If you are more to judge others than on yourself, there cannot be .

2. When you find yourself judging , first ask yourself if you are blameless in those areas. When you have taken care of the issue responsibly , you will better understand how to be most helpful to .

3. When you know you value and live accordingly, you will find peace. , it is yours to share. You cannot give a you do not have.

佳句翻译

1. 当你发现你在评价别人时,首先问问你自己是否有这个资格。

2. 不要寻找别人的过错,要将精力集中于去创造一个调整状况或是避免错误再次发生的方法上。

3. 清楚地了解,对你来说什么才是重要的,有意义和有价值的。

短语应用

1. If you are more likely to judge others than reflect on yourself, there cannot be peace.

reflect on:仔细考虑,思考;反省;回想,回顾;怀疑

2. Each person has to pay it or they simply cannot have it. Here are a few ways to save up for it.

save up for:为……而储蓄