书城公版Roundabout Papers
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第66章

You would have fancied that, as after all we were only some half-dozen on board, she might have dispensed with her red handkerchief, and talked, and eaten her dinner in comfort: but in covering her chin there was a kind of modesty.That beard was her profession:

that beard brought the public to see her: out of her business she wished to put that beard aside as it were: as a barrister would wish to put off his wig.I know some who carry theirs into private life, and who mistake you and me for jury-boxes when they address us: but these are not your modest barristers, not your true gentlemen.

Well, I own I respected the lady for the modesty with which, her public business over, she retired into private life.She respected her life, and her beard.That beard having done its day's work, she puts it away in her handkerchief; and becomes, as far as in her lies, a private ordinary person.All public men and women of good sense, I should think, have this modesty.When, for instance, in my small way, poor Mrs.Brown comes simpering up to me, with her album in one hand, a pen in the other, and says, "Ho, ho, dear Mr.

Roundabout, write us one of your amusing," &c.&c., my beard drops behind my handkerchief instantly.Why am I to wag my chin and grin for Mrs.Brown's good pleasure? My dear madam, I have been ****** faces all day.It is my profession.I do my comic business with the greatest pains, seriousness, and trouble: and with it make, Ihope, a not dishonest livelihood.If you ask Mons.Blondin to tea, you don't have a rope stretched from your garret window to the opposite side of the square, and request Monsieur to take his tea out on the centre of the rope? I lay my hand on this waistcoat, and declare that not once in the course of our voyage together did Iallow the Kentucky Giant to suppose I was speculating on his stature, or the Bearded Lady to surmise that I wished to peep under the handkerchief which muffled the lower part of her face."And the more fool you," says some cynic.(Faugh, those cynics, I hate 'em!)Don't you know, sir, that a man of genius is pleased to have his genius recognized; that a beauty likes to be admired; that an actor likes to be applauded; that stout old Wellington himself was pleased, and smiled when the people cheered him as he passed?

Suppose you had paid some respectful compliment to that lady?

Suppose you had asked that giant, if, for once, he would take anything at the liquor-bar? you might have learned a great deal of curious knowledge regarding giants and bearded ladies, about whom you evidently now know very little.There was that little boy of three years old, with a fine beard already, and his little legs and arms, as seen out of his little frock, covered with a dark down.

What a queer little capering satyr! He was quite good-natured, childish, rather solemn.He had a little Norval dress, I remember:

the drollest little Norval.