--The drawing-room of MR. MORTON'S villa. Large open arch in centre, leading to veranda, looking on distant view of San Francisco; richly furnished,--sofas, arm-chairs, and tete-a-tetes.
Enter COL. STARBOTTLE, C., carrying bouquet, preceded by SERVANT, bowing.
Starbottle. Take my kyard to Miss Morris. [Exit SERVANT.
Starbottle. Star! This is the momentous epoch of your life! It is a moment for which you--are--I may say alone responsible,--personally responsible! She will be naturally gratified by the--er--flowers. She will at once recognize this bouquet as a delicate souvenir of Red Gulch, and will appreciate your recollection. And the fact, the crushing fact, that you have overlooked the--er--ungentlemanly conduct of her OWN cousin Sandy, the real Alexander Morton, that you have--er--assisted to restore the ex-vaquero to his rights, will--er--er--at once open the door to--er--mutual confidence and--er--a continuance of that--er--prepossession I have already noticed. Ahem! here she is.
Enter MISS MARY in full dress.
Miss Mary. You are early, Col. Starbottle. This promptitude does honor to our poor occasion.
Col. Starbottle. Ged, Miss Mary, promptness with a lady and an adversary is the first duty of--er--gentleman. I wished that--er--the morning dew might still be--er--fresh in these flowers. I gathered them myself (presenting bouquet) at--er--er--flower-stand in the--er--California market.
Miss Mary (aside). Flowers! I needed no such reminder of poor Sandy. (Aloud.) I thank you, colonel.
Starbattle. Ged, ma'am, I am repaid doubly. Your conduct, Miss Mary, reminds me of little incident that occurred at Richmond, in '58. Dinner party--came early--but obliged to go--as now--on important business, before dessert--before dessert. Lady sat next to me--beautiful woman--excuse me if I don't mention names--said to me, "Star,"--always called me Star,--"Star, you remind me of the month of May."--"Ged, madam,"--I said, "delighted, proud; but why?"--"Because," she said, "you come in with the--er--oysters."--No! Ged, pardon me--ridiculous mistake! I mean--er--"you come in with the--er--flowers, and go before the--er--fruits."
Miss Mary. Ah, colonel! I appreciate her disappointment. Let us hope, however, that some day you may find that happy woman who will be able to keep you through the whole dinner and the whole season, until December and the ices!
Starbottle. Ged! excellent! Capital! (seriously.) Miss Mary!
(Suddenly inflating his chest, striking attitude, and gazing on MISS MARY with languishing eyes.) There is--er such a woman!
Miss Mary (aside). What can he mean?
Starbottle (taking seat beside her). Allow me, Miss Mary, a few moments of confidential--er--confidential disclosure. To-day is, as you are aware--the day on which, according to--er--agreement between parties, my friend and client, Mr. Morton, sen.,--formally accepts his prodigal son. It is my--er--duty to state that--er--the gentleman who has for the past year occupied that position has behaved with great discretion, and--er--fulfilled his part of the--er--agreement. But it would--er--appear that there has been a--er--slight delusion regarding the identity of that prodigal,--a delusion shared by all the parties except, perhaps, myself. I have to prepare you for a shock. The gentleman whom you have recently known as Alexander Morton, jun., is not the prodigal son; is not your--er--cousin; is, in fact, no relation to you. Prepare yourself, Miss Mary, for a little disappointment,--for--er--degradation. The genuine son has been--er--discovered in the person of--er--low menial--or--vagabond,--"Sandy," the--er--outcast of Red Gulch!
Miss Mary (rising in astonishment). Sandy! Then he was right.
(Aside.) The child is his! and that woman--Starbottle. Compose yourself, Miss Mary. I know the--er--effect of--er--revelation like this upon--er--proud and aristocratic nature. Ged! My own, I assure you, beats in--er--responsive indignation. You can never consent to remain beneath this roof, and--er--receive a--er--vagabond and--er--menial on equal terms.