书城公版A House-Boat on the Styx
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第23章 STORY-TELLERS'NIGHT(2)

The effect was instantaneous.Compared to a personal encounter between the two great figures of Waterloo,a reading from his own works by Goldsmith seemed lacking in the elements essential to the holding of an audience.Consequently,attention was centred in the belligerent warriors,and,by some odd mistake,when a peace-loving member of the assemblage,realizing the indecorousness of the incident,cried out,"Put him out!put him out!"the attendants rushed in,and,taking poor Goldsmith by his collar,hustled him out through the door,across the deck,and tossed him ashore without reference to the gang-plank.This accomplished,a personal explanation of their course was made by the quarrelling generals,and,peace having been restored,a committee was sent in search of Goldsmith with suitable apologies.The good and kindly soul returned,but having lost his book in the melee,much to his own gratification,as well as to that of the audience,he was permitted to rest in quiet the balance of the evening.

"Is he through?"said Johnson,poking his head in at the door when order was restored.

"Yes,sir,"said Boswell;"that is to say,he has retired permanently from the field.He didn't finish,though.""Fellow-spooks,"began Johnson once more,"now that you have been delighted with the honeyed eloquence of the last speaker,it is my privilege to present to you that eminent fabulist Baron Munchausen,the greatest unrealist of all time,who will give you an exhibition of his paradoxical power of lying while standing."The applause which greeted the Baron was deafening.He was,beyond all doubt,one of the most popular members of the club.

"Speaking of whales,"said he,leaning gracefully against the table.

"Nobody has mentioned 'em,"said Johnson.

"True,"retorted the Baron;"but you always suggest them by your apparently unquenchable thirst for spouting--speaking of whales,my friend Jonah,as well as the rest of you,may be interested to know that I once had an experience similar to his own,and,strange to say,with the identical whale."Jonah arose from his seat in the back of the room."I do not wish to be unpleasant,"he said,with a strong effort to be calm,"but I wish to ask if Judge Blackstone is in the room.""I am,"said the Judge,rising."What can I do for you?""I desire to apply for an injunction restraining the Baron from using my whale in his story.That whale,your honor,is copyrighted,"said Jonah."If I had any other claim to the affection of mankind than the one which is based on my experience with that leviathan,I would willingly permit the Baron to introduce him into his story;but that whale,your honor,is my stock in trade--he is my all.""I think Jonah's point is well taken,"said Blackstone,turning to the Baron."It would be a distinct hardship,I think,if the plaintiff in this action were to be deprived of the exclusive use of his sole accessory.The injunction prayed for is therefore granted.