Gillian says, "Three months ago l started working as an office manager for a PR company and my confidence has just disappeared. I' ve always wanted to move up the career ladder—but now I' m on the next step, I worry I can' t live up to the role. My previous job was as an office administrator and I was there for four years. I knew everyone really well and there was always a colleague to chat to. I also didn' t have to push myself too hard. But I always wanted a bigger challenge. I was really excited to get a more senior position, but now my nervousness is holding me back, and I know I need to get over it. My new job involves organizing the running of the office and on my first day in a meeting, I felt I wasn' t making myself understood. I know there' s a lot to learn but every night since, my mind has reeled with things I might have done wrong. The other day, I transferred a call to the wrong person. All day I expected to be given the sack. I worry what people think of me even though, logically, I know they' re busy and I' m the last person on their mind. I worry that people think l can' t cope with responsibility. It' s strange as I' m confident in other areas of my life. I' m in a steady relationship and I have a busy social life."
David Wood is a life coach and entrepreneur. The expert says, "Firstly, Gillian should be congratulated for stepping out of her comfort zone. Many people who aren' t forced to push themselves in their current position wouldn' t even take a new job—they' d have stayed where it was safe—so she' s really demonstrated courage here. However, Gillian seems to have a deep belief that goes something like, ' I' m useless, worthless, and any second they' ll find out!' Even though her brain knows this is not true, as is the case with many people, she' s finding it difficult to suppress those negative feelings. To boost confidence when your mind is bursting with things you might have done wrong, try writing down a list of everything you' ve done right. Often, people around you don' t comment on the good things you do, but do remark on mistakes made. So, writing a list will help you put things into perspective. Also, ask for feedback so you can hear how you' re really coming across, rather than letting your fears overrun the reality of the situation. If your boss is too busy to give you feedback, find a mentor at work who you can confide in and lean on for support, and who' ll be honest with you. Also, the next time you start beating yourself up over failures, try this: stop and take notice of the fear building within you, accept it, and then make a conscious decision not to let it determine your decisions. For example, if you find yourself afraid to ask your boss how the report you did was, take notice of the fear, then tell your fear 'Thanks for the input' , and choose how you want to respond to it. Keep practicing this and you' ll find yourself more in charge of your actions and feelings, and your confidence will grow."
吉莉安说：“三个月前，我在一家公关公司做办公室主任时，信心渐渐减退。我常常想在事业上有所进步——但是现在我还在事业的底层，我担心自己不能扮演好这个角色。我原来的工作是办公室的行政人员，工作了四年。我与那里的每一个人都很熟悉，还常常与他们聊天。我也不必对自己要求太严格，但是我一直想接受更大的挑战。我非常高兴能得到晋升，但是现在我的精神状态让我无法控制，我明白我需要克服它。我的新工作包括组织办公室的运转，但是在第一天的工作会议上，我觉得自己有些迷惑。我知道自己需要学习的地方还很多，但是每天晚上我的大脑中时常会萦绕着我所犯的错误。那天，我把电话转错了人，一整天都感到可能会被炒鱿鱼。我担心大家怎么评价我，虽然我知道大家都太忙了，根本不注意我。我担心有人会认为我不称职。很奇怪，我在生活的其他方面是很自信的啊，我有着牢固的朋友关系，并忙于社会生活。”
大卫·伍德是一位生活教练和企业家。他说：“首先，要庆祝吉莉安走出了她的‘安逸区’。许多人在他们当前的工作岗位上并没有给自己任何压力，也没有找新工作——他们待在安全地带——所以她展现出了自己的勇气。然而，吉莉安好像有一种极深的信念，比如：‘我没用，没有价值，他们立刻就发现了！’甚至尽管她心里知道这不是真的，就像许多人一样，但她还是发现很难抑制那些负面感觉。当你的想法被或许是你做错了的事弄得崩溃时，试着列出一张你做对的事的清单来增强信心。人们通常不会关住你做对的事，而是留意你做错的事。
所以，列出一张清单会帮助你把这些事情看得更透彻。所以，去寻找反馈，这样可以使你了解自己真正做得怎样，而不是任你的恐惧感超越事情的真实情况。如果你的老板太忙了而不能给你反馈，你可以在工作中寻找对你以诚相待的指导者，信赖并依靠他的支持。随后，当你再次痛斥自己的失败时，试着这样做：停止斥责，关注你内心的恐惧，并接受它，接着做一个不让它影响你决心的有意识的决定。例如，如果你发现自己害怕询问老板你做的报告究竟如何时，关注这种恐惧，并告诉自己心中的恐惧‘感谢您的参与’，然后选择你想要的回应方式。坚持练习，你就会发现自己在更多地管理自己的行为和感觉，你的信心也会随之增强。”
对成功抱有信心，就接近成功。
administrator [d'ministreit] n. 管理人；行政官
You need administrator rights to do this.
做这些需要管理员权限。
reel [ri:l] v. 卷；绕；眩晕