The onset of spring in Britain may come quietly due to dwindling numbers of cuckoos， conservationistsconservationist n.(天然资源的)保护管理论者 said. The Woodland Trust said numbers of the gray birds， beloved by Britons for announcing the end of winter with their distinctive cooing， has fallen by up to 60 percent since the 1970s. Amid fears cuckoos are falling victim to an ever more unsettled climate and aggressive modern farming methods， the charity asked Britons to go on alert for the noisy birds. “Everyone is needed to listen out for the first cuckoo they hear，” the Trust said in astatement， “Even if you usually hear the cuckoo， but don，t hear one this year，please let us know.” Infamous for their habit of laying eggs in other birds， nests - a hen cuckoo can swap another birds egg with her own in just 15 seconds -the birds have always held a special place in British hearts as harbingers of spring. The Woodland Trust and the British Trust of Ornithology want naturegoersto send them information about cuckoosightings for a survey on changes to Britain，s seasons. They have also asked for news of the arrival of swifts， swallows， bumblebeesbumblebee v.大黄蜂，熊蜂 ， queen wasps， and daisies.
鸟声寥落的春天
环保主义者们说，由于杜鹃鸟的数量日渐减少，英国的春天也许会静悄悄地来临。林地信托基金会说这种灰色鸟儿的数量自20世纪70年代以来已经减少了60%。杜鹃以独特的咕咕声宣告冬天的结束，因此受到英国人的宠爱。由于担心它会成为日趋多变的气候以及掠夺式的现代耕作方法的牺牲品，该慈善团体要求英国人特别留意这种聒噪的鸟儿。“每个人都要留心倾听杜鹃的第一声啼鸣，”基金会在一项声明中说，“即便是你通常能听到它的叫声，而今年没有听到，也请（把这种情况）告诉我们。”杜鹃在其他鸟的巢中下蛋的习性早已声名狼藉——雌杜鹃能在15秒内用自己的蛋换走其他鸟儿的蛋 ——但它作为春天的信使一直在英国人心目中占有特殊的地位。林地信托基金会和英国鸟类学信托基金会希望去野外的人们把看到杜鹃的情况告知他们，以便完成一项关于英国季节变化的调查。同时他们也征集有关雨燕、燕子、大黄蜂、黄蜂后和雏菊花出现的消息。
Little Old Ladies Just Want to Have Fun
The days of elderly women doing nothing but cooking huge meals on holidays and knitting themselves slowly into senilitysenility n.高龄， 老迈年高， 老态龙钟 are gone.
Enter the Red Hat Society - a group dedicated to the radical notion that old ladies should have fun.
While men have long spent their retirements fishing and playing golf， women have sometimes seemed to become invisibleinvisible adj.看不见的， 无形的 as they age. But the generation now turning 50 is the baby boomers， and the same people who rejected their parents， way of being young are now forging a new way of growing old.
老太太们也要给自己找乐子
从前，中老年妇女们除了烹饪假日大餐，在如梭岁月中慢慢变老之外无所事事，现在这种日子已经一去不复返了。
加入“红帽会社”吧，这是一个有点激进的组织，致力于推崇“中老年妇女同样应该享受快乐生活”的理念。
长期以来，男人们退休后可以靠钓鱼或打高尔夫来消遣时光，女人们有时却变得和她们的年龄一样毫不显眼。然而，眼下正迈向50岁门槛的这代人正是在“婴儿潮”时期出生的那一批人。这批人当初拒绝他们父辈年轻时的生活方式，如今又在寻求“慢慢变老”的新方式。
The World，s Worst Spy
He，s definitelydefinitely adv.明确地， 干脆地 NOT James Bond - nor even Austin Powers. And now the world，s worst spy， codename Piglet， is facing 14 years in jail after bungling an attempt to sell secrets to the Russians.
Aircraft engineer Ian Parr， 46， tried to pass on secrets of seven sensitive projects for ￡130，000 to a man he thought was a Russian agent called Aleksei.But it turned out that accidentprone Parr - once nicknamed “Hazard” by colleagues- actually handed over the secrets to an MI5 agent.
As the fatheroftwo sat in the pub drinking a pint of lager to celebrate the ￡25，000 he had just been given， police swooped and arrested him for spying.
But his troubles were not over.
While in Belmarsh Prison， the distraughtdistraught adj.发狂的 keepfit fanatic and rambler - who had given himself the codename Piglet - tried to kill himself.
He wired his spectacles to the mains to try to electrocute himself - but he only succeeded in leaving an outline of his glasses burned on to his face.
Parr had a reputation for being a bungler long before his spying attempt.
As a teenager， he joined the Army， where he earned his nickname Hazard.
An excolleague said： “If you wanted a job doing， Hazard would do it badly. He blew up the barracks washing machine by overloadingoverloading 过载， 超载， 过负载 it.”
“He was forever injuring himself when loading shells into the gun turret of the tank. I lost count of the number of times I saw him with bandages and plasters on his fingers.”
“You，d hear him clanging around and there，d be a yelp and he，d squeal， Oh， my bloody fingers，. He，s very lucky to have all his fingers left.”
Parr earned ￡25，000 a year at BAE systems. It is thought that he tried to make money from spying because of worries about redundancies at the firm.
世界上最笨的间谍
英国一个给自己取名代号为“小猪”的航天部工作人员将情报卖给“俄罗斯间谍”——而实际上“俄罗斯间谍”正是军情五处的情报人员，他因此被捕，面临14年的监禁。
据报道，46岁的航空工程师伊安·皮尔将涉及7个敏感项目的机密卖给一个名叫艾里克斯的“前苏联间谍”，以换取13万英镑的酬金。结果这个常常粗心大意、被同事取了个外号叫“冒失鬼”的家伙又一次出错——那个“俄罗斯间谍”是军情五处的特工。
他在得了卖情报的第一笔酬金2.5万英镑后，跑到一个酒吧里叫了一品脱的酒庆祝，就在这时，警察冲了进来将他逮捕归案。
他的麻烦还没完。被捕后，他将自己的眼镜伸入电源企图触电自杀，结果这事也没办成，更糟的是眼镜还在他的脸上灼了个大印。
据认识他的人表示，皮尔一直就是一个蠢蛋。他在十多岁时参军，就在那时得了个外号“冒失鬼”。
他的一个前同事说：“如果你想做一件事，冒失鬼总能把它办得最糟。他让洗衣机超负荷运转，结果弄得爆炸。在给坦克的枪支装弹时又不断地弄伤自己。我已记不清有多少次看见他的手指上缠着绷带或胶布了。总是在一阵丁零当啷的声音之后，听到他的惨叫：哎呀，我的手指！现在他的手指还齐全已属非常幸运了。”
皮尔在航天部的年薪有2.5万英镑，据说他是因为担心裁员所以铤而走险。
Cat Travels 700 Miles to Stay with Owners
A cat has stowed away on a lorry to rejoin her owners - after they left her 700 miles away in France.
Anthony Lewis and wife Sam gave their cat Maisy to the buyers of their home because they did not want to put her through the upheaval upheaval n.剧变of moving to Jersey.
But they were amazed when Maisy then turned up in the van delivering some of their belongingsbelongings n.财产， 所有物， 相关事物， 亲戚 to the Channel island.
She had sneaked aboard the truck and gone without food or water for two days as it travelled across France.
Her journey began in the Languedoc region near Spain and ended with a ferry trip to Jersey.
Delivery driver Tim Morley told The Sun： “I loaded the van up in the middle of the night and when I got to Jersey left it in the depot overnight.”
When I went back I could hear faint crying from the van and saw the cat.
“I put food down and she came out. Then I rang Anthony and described the cat. He said it sounded just like Maisy.”
Anthony said： “We were overjoyed. We always knew she was a clever cat.”
小猫千里寻主
一只被主人送给他人的“忠猫”从法国出发，跋涉700英里（合1120公里）前往英国的杰西称与主人团聚。
猫的主人安东尼·刘易斯和妻子山姆前段时间从法国举家迁居英国杰西。他们把法国的房子卖掉后，决定将他们猫“麦西”送给房子的新主人，因为他们不想“麦西”承受搬迁带来的生活变迁。
但是，刘易斯夫妇没有想到，他们会在杰西再一次看到他们的猫——这个小家伙连续两天忍饥挨饿，藏在运送行李的货车上追到了主人所在的新城市。
刘易斯夫妇都对能与“麦西”重逢感到非常高兴，安东尼还说：“我们一直都知道她是只聪明的猫。”
The Ticket