书城文学中小学生必读丛书:沙与沫
5394300000038

第38章 言别(2)

It is a flame spirit in you ever gathering more of itself,While you, heedless of its expansion, bewail the withering of your days.

It is life in quest of life in bodies that fear the grave.

There are no graves here.

These mountains and plains are a cradle and a stepping- stone.

Whenever you pass by the field where you have laid your ancestors lookwell thereupon, and you shall see yourselves and your Children dancinghand in hand.

Verily you often make merry without knowing.

Others have come to you to whom for golden promises made unto yourfaith you have given but riches and power and glory.

Less than a promise have I given, and yet more generous have you beento me.

You have given me deeper thirsting after life.

Surely there is no greater gift to a man than that which turns all his aimsinto parching lips and all life into a fountain.

And in this lies my honour and my reward,That whenever I come to the fountain to drink I find the living water itself thirsty;And it drinks me while I drink it.

你们中有人责备我在领受礼物上是太狷傲、太羞怯了。

在领受劳金上我是太骄傲了,在领受礼物上却不如此。

虽然在你们请我赴席的时候,我却在山中采食浆果,在你们款留我的时候,我却在寺院的廊下睡眠,但岂不是你们对我的日夜的关怀,使我的饮食有味,使我的魂梦甜美么?

为此我正要祝福你们:

你们给予了许多,却不知道你们已经给予。

真的,“慈悲”自己看镜的时候,变成石像。

“善行”自赐嘉名的时候,变成了咒诅的根源。

你们中有人说我高蹈,与我自己的“孤独”对饮,你们也说过:“他和山林谈论却不和人说话。

他独自坐在山巅,俯视我们的城市。”

我确曾攀登高山,孤行远地。

但除了在更高更远之处,我怎能看见你们呢?

除了相远之外,人们怎能相近呢?

Some of you have deemed me proud and over-shy to receive gifts.

To proud indeed am I to receive wages, but not gifts.

And though I have eaten berries among the hill when you would havehad me sit at your board,

And slept in the portico of the temple where you would gladly havesheltered me,Yet was it not your loving mindfulness of my days and my nights thatmade food sweet to my mouth and girdled my sleep with visions?

For this I bless you most:

You give much and know not that you give at all.

Verily the kindness that gazes upon itself in a mirror tums to stone,And a good deed that calls itself by tender names becomes the parent toa curse.

And some of you have called me aloof, and drank with my ownaloneness,

And you have said, "He holds council with the trees of the forest, butnot with men.

He sits alone on hill-tops and looks down upon our city."

True it is that I have climbed the hills and walked in remote places.

How could I have seen you save from a great height or a great distance?

How can one be indeed near unless he be far?

还有人在无言中对我呼唤,他们说:

“异乡人,异乡人,‘至高’的爱慕者,为什么你住在那鹰鸟做巢的山峰上呢?

为什么你要追求那不能达到的事物呢?

在你的窝巢中,你要网罗甚样的风雨,要捕取天空中哪一种的虚幻的飞鸟呢?

加入我们吧。

你下来用我们的面包充饥,用我们的醇酒解渴吧。”

在他们灵魂的静默中,他们说了这些话;

但是他们若再静默些,他们就知道我所要网罗的,只是你们的喜乐和哀痛的奥秘。

And others among you called unto me, not in words, and they said,"Stranger, stranger, lover of unreachable heights, why dwell you amongthe summits where eagles build their nests?

Why seek you the unattainable?

What storms would you trap in your net,And what vaporous birds do you hunt in the sky?

Come and be one of us.

Descend and appease your hunger with our bread and quench your thirstwith our wine."

In the solitude of their souls they said these things;But were their solitude deeper they would have known that I sought butthe secret of your joy and your pain.

我所要捕取的,只是你们在天空中飞行的“大我”。

但是猎者也曾是猎品。

因为从我弓上射出的箭矢,有许多支是瞄向我自己的胸膛。

并且那飞翔者也曾是爬行者;

因为我的翅翼在日下展开的时候,在地上的影儿却是一个龟鳖。

我是信仰者也曾是怀疑者;

因为我常常用手指抚触自己的伤痕,使我对你们有更大的信仰与认识。

凭着这信仰与认识,我说:

你们不是幽闭在躯壳之内,也不是禁锢在房舍与田野之中。

你们的“真我”是住在云间,与风同游。

你们不是在日中匍匐取暖,在黑暗里钻穴求安的一只动物,却是一件自由的物事,一个包涵大地在以太中运行的魂灵。

And I hunted only your larger selves that walk thesky.

But the hunter was also the hunted.

For many of my arrows left my bow only to seekmy own breast.

And the flier was also the creeper;

For when my wings were spread in the sun theirshadow upon the earth was a turtle.

And I the believer was also the doubter;

For often have I put my finger in my own woundthat I might have the greater belief in you and thegreater knowledge of you.

And it is with this belief and this knowledge that Isay,

You are not enclosed within your bodies, norconfined to houses or fields.

That which is you dwells above the mountain androves with the wind.

It is not a thing that crawls into the sun for warmthor digs holes into darkness for safety,But a thing free, a spirit that envelops the earthand moves in the ether.

如果这是模棱的言语,就不必寻求把这些话弄明白。

模糊与混沌是万物的起始,却不是终结。

我愿意你们当我是个起始。

生命,和一切有生,都隐藏在烟雾里,不在水晶中。

谁知道水晶就是凝固的云雾呢?

在忆念我的时候,我愿你们记着这个:

你们心中最软弱、最迷乱的,就是那最刚强、最坚决的。